Success Stories Aren't Always Happy

I believe that success in the anti-poverty community stems from relationship building. CMCA recently lost a friend that was a model of this success. I didn't know Mr. Wyss myself but he touched a lot of people as an Ally in our Circles project. You can see his obituary here but the story that follows really hit a cord with me. The story is told by Circles Coach, Colita Harvey.


The Wyss Family first learned about Circles and was introduced to Bridges out of Poverty workbook through Don Day's Sunday School class. For two months, Don taught Bridges out of Poverty to his Sunday School Class, and from that, the Wyss family came to visit our Circles group meeting. This was the third Thursday of the month, where a Big View topic of political issues was discussed and led by a Guiding Coalition member. In addition to the topic, we also did an activity that night called “Speed Dating”. This gave people the opportunity to get to know each other, which everyone enjoyed doing because there were quite a few new faces in the group that night. After the meeting, John and Barbara Wyss came up to me, gave me their email address and wanted to know more in detail about how to become a part of the whole Circle Initiative and also become Allies to a Circle Leader. The next day, I emailed them a flyer which talked about how they could be a part of the initiative, along with the previous Guiding Coalition minutes, and a copy of November monthly agenda. The Wyss’s returned the next meeting and participated in the group discussion sharing their ideas/thoughts, and gave the group advice on certain topics mentioned that night. Later that month we all noticed that John had a walking cane with him and he joked about his legs being pretty weak that night. That next week, while families painted pumpkins and made masks for Family Fun Night Mr. Wyss sat in one seat all night and didn’t get up until it was time to go. We all noticed that he had replaced the cane with a walker to assist him in walking. In November, Don Day mentioned in our Circle meeting that John was now very ill and the doctors knew it was cancer but didn’t know what type or how bad it was. Don also reported that John wasn’t walking anymore at all and had been admitted to the hospital. Don passed around a get well card for all to sign and write words of encouragement. The circle group immediately felt sad, and I told everyone to keep the Wyss family in their thoughts. Vicki, our VISTA worker, had gone by to see John a few times and sat with him, just to make his spirits better, because by this time John and the doctors knew the cancer was all over his body including his brain, and John said he could die any day because the cancer was eating up his body. John's hair and beard were long and white, but he recently cut his hair because he knew that the radiation treatment would make it fall out and he would rather cut his hair before it fell out. At that point, John only had a few sessions left before the doctors would stop all radiation treatment because the treatment wasn't helping his condition. Again, these reports were given to me and the Circle group either by Don or Vicki who went to visit John on a weekly basis. On November 20^th the Circle group meal had a Thanksgiving theme where the Circle members and Guiding Coalition members all brought dishes to make a huge Thanksgiving meal. I sat in the front greeting everyone as they arrived and to everyone's surprise the pastor of Broadway Christian Church was wheeling in John Wyss to the Circle meeting. John had requested a 2 hour pass from the hospital and with his pass he decided to spend it with the Circle families. We all greeted him one at a time and told him how much he had been in our thoughts and spoke about how much we missed him. He sat and had dinner with us for a little more than an hour before heading back to the hospital. The men in the Circle group assisted him to the men’s room first, before going to the car. While he was in the men’s room his wife spoke about how everyone should cherish each moment and not take for granted the time they have to spend with their family. She had no idea how much longer she had with her husband. The group gave her words of encouragement, knowing how difficult sharing had been while talking through a stream of tears. When John finished in the men’s room everyone told John bye and the men then assisted him to the car. For the next 10 minutes the whole group was just amazed about how John took his first and possible only pass from the hospital and chose to spend it with us - the Boone County Circle group.

Walter John Wyss II, 63, of Columbia died Friday, Jan. 2, 2009, in Columbia.